The hacker with the supernumerary nipple

22 October 2022

Annotated Version Of Liz Truss Resignation Speech

by Gianni Tedesco

Some say she’s the worst prime minister in UK history. UK history isn’t very long so they probably mean English history. Either way, I think that would be a hasty judgement. It could easily be the case that she has set in motion the destruction of the conservative party as a viable force in English politics. That would make her probably the best prime minister in history. The competititon isn’t exactly stiff. What follows is an annotated version of the resignation speech given by Liz Truss. I hadn’t seen any useful commentary of this anywhere so I thought I’d add my own. The speech was impressive, not so much in it’s content, but more for her ability to forcibly grin like an imbecile for that long.

I came into office at a time of great economic and international instability.

Your party has been in power for 12 years.

Families and businesses were worried about how to pay their bills,

Your party has been in power for 12 years.

Putin’s illegal war in Ukraine threatens the security of our whole continent

Irrelevant. But no, it doesn’t.

and our country has been held back for too long by low economic growth.

Thanks to your party, which has been in power for 12 years.

I was elected by the Conservative Party with a mandate to change this.

Just not a democratic mandate.

We delivered on energy bills and on cutting National Insurance.

No, you did not. You proposed to pay people’s energy bill by borrowing money that they would have to pay back with interest.

And we set out a vision for a low tax, high growth economy that would take advantage of the freedoms of Brexit.

You say “vision”. The world says “delusion”.

I recognise though, given the situation, I cannot deliver the mandate on which I was elected by the Conservative Party.

Nobody cares what they want. They can all die in a fire, and it would be their own fault for not leaving the fire.

I have therefore spoken to His Majesty the King to notify him that I am resigning as leader of the Conservative Party.

A touching moment, shared between two unelected leaders.

This morning I met the chairman of the 1922 Committee, Sir Graham Brady.

A body with less constitutional validity than the Iranian guardian council.

We’ve agreed that there will be a leadership election, to be completed within the next week.

An irrelevant party-political trifle.

This will ensure that we remain on a path to deliver our fiscal plans and maintain our country’s economic stability and national security.

By this, I presume you mean “maintaining the current rate of rapid decline”.

I will remain as prime minister until a successor has been chosen.

That you yet cling to this amount of power (like a fucking tick) is, in itself, a disease of our political system (limes disease, I suppose).

Thank you.

For what?!

tags: politics - rants